No matter what I say, I know that human relationships matter a lot to me. Maybe that’s why I somehow distance myself from people who matter to me. I am, mostly, scared of getting hurt.
Nevertheless, I have a story of a night from more than a year ago which I remembered so profoundly yesterday and I want to vent it somewhere.
Last night I was listening to a song (Ghar- by Piyush Mishra), which now I’m in love with. I ended up remembering the first time a friend made me listen to it. He not just makes you listen to a song, rather he explains it.
I was in a cab, returning back from the office.
He called and asked me if I’d like to join him at a place nearby. He was already there, drinking.
My subconscious mind refused to go.
No particular reason, but I was in no mood to drink and was tired.
Instead, I asked him who’s there with him and he said, “No one.”
I instantly said I’m coming.
The only reason I went there that night was because that idiot was sitting there all alone, drinking. I was never a person who leaves her friends alone.
It was a good place with a nice view. We could see the moon from where we were seated.
He made me listen to many songs that night, he still does. I always tell him, that I don’t like songs by listening to them just once. I take my time to develop my likings, then be it for anything. I don’t think he even knows that half of my playlists consists of his recommended songs.
He has a habit of recommending movies too.
He asked me to watch “Pyaasa” that one time.
I added it to my list but never watched it.
Instead I saw “Kagaz ke Phool” that night after reaching home.
I had a feeling that there’ll be a day when I would want to watch that movie he recommended.
Also, while going back home, he told me about his family issues, I listened, just like I always do.
I never pity him and nobody should. Rather I feel good when I see him trying to do better each day and not giving up despite his surroundings being so ugly.
He reached home and told me that I should forget whatever he said that time. I said I’d never tell anyone and I still haven’t. I am not sure if he talks about his issues to everyone.
Wish I could tell him that I care and that I’d always be there.
So, last night I ended up seeing that movie (Pyaasa-1957).
I believe it was way ahead of its time. Amazing story, wonderful music, about a struggling poet and how people are treated differently when they get fame. When a person is dead, people value them way more than when they are alive.
Last 20 mins of the movie are so sentimental and it tells how cruel and selfish people around you could be.
At certain moments, it ends up making you feel sad and see the reality of life. I love these kind of movies.
क्युकी, ये दुनिया अगर मिल भी जाये तो क्या हैं?
Also, yesterday while listening to that song and watching that movie, I certainly missed that night with him.
I am not even sure if I could call it a beautiful night.
Rather than telling him I’m posting it here.
Because now, I don’t even know if he remembers it.
The entire lyrics of the song are very heartfelt. Ending this blog with just one line below-
लेकिन मेरी बात इक याद रखना, मुझको हमेशा ही हाँ साथ रखना!